consecrate yourself to mary
Ashley shares her story:
Through my life, God has always been there whether I knew it or not. I grew up as a cradle Catholic in Edmond, Oklahoma. When I was 13y/o, I moved to Fort Worth, and I went to a Catholic school there. Regnum Christi came to my school the next year. That was my first time of being introduced to religious life and consecrated women. They created a girls’ group that met once a week and it centered around formation and deepening our
relationship with Christ. They would hold retreats and we would do community service projects. In the summers, I went to Regnum Christi camps around the United States.
When I was 14y/o, my mom asked me if I wanted to be a coworker for a summer. A coworker would live with the consecrated women for a couple of months during the summer or a year and they would shadow the consecrated women. I said yes, of course! I would get to go overseas and put on Catholic camps for girls. I was sent to Ireland where I lived with the consecrated women for two months. While I was there, we held a camp in Knock, Ireland. I visited Our Lady of Knock church and was very moved. My time in Ireland was a transformation and for the first time, I felt the call to be a consecrated woman. I saw the joy, freedom, and happiness living with the consecrated and wanted that for my life.
In 2009, I graduated high school and left for college. My freshman year of college, I walked onto my college rowing team and tried to balance the athletic/academic lifestyle with the party life that comes with college and failed miserably, and was sent home after the first year. The rest of my college years were spent dedicated to my education and trying to figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my professional life.
After graduating college, I also started dating. I had a two-year relationship where I thought I was meant for the married life and found out he was not the one. It was my first real relationship and was emotionally hard for me because he had converted to Catholicism and we talked about getting married.
I spent the next eight years trying to fill the void in my heart with worldly material things instead of godly things but continued to go to church. In February of 2024, right before Lent, my mom called me and told me that I needed to figure out what makes me happy. I thought of all the things that made me happy but didn’t know how to apply it to my life/career. Then I thought, “Well, when was I the happiest in my life?” Then I remembered when I was 14y/o and the call to consecrated life, and kept the thought in the back of my mind. I started to make baby steps on changing my life style and to start living the Catholic faith. I slowly cut out friends that were not living the Catholic lifestyle, I went to adoration more, and started reading the Diary of St. Faustina. I also prayed for God to send me a good, Catholic husband. That Easter Sunday, after receiving communion, I went back in the pew. I was doing my normal prayers when I heard an internal thought that I knew wasn’t my own and said, “It’s done.” I knew it was from God and I thought it meant that God was sending me a husband! I was so excited and wondered who I was going to bump into after mass. Man, was I wrong! I didn’t bump into anyone.
Two weeks later, I saw a post on social media for “Day of Reflection: for Women Discerning Religious Life”. I said to myself, “Ok, I will sign up for that”. On May 18, 2024, I went to the reflection day. During all the talks from Fr. Jerome, Fr. Phil, and Sr. Barbara Joseph (Carmelite Superior in OKC), everything they were saying was speaking to me. I kept thinking, “I can do that, I can do all the stuff they are saying.”
Everything was clear on why I wasn’t content in my life and I knew being a religious sister was my calling. At the end of the day, I was given resources of books to read about discernment and was recommended a spiritual director.
On August 15, 2025, the Assumption of Mary, I went to confession and the priest said, give yourself to Mary and reflect on her love. During Mass, two different times, I heard, “consecrate yourself to Mary” and every time I would disregard it. On the third time, I knew it was Mary inviting me to consecrate myself to her and I responded, “ok, ok, ok, I will”. After mass I talked to Sally, and she gave me the “Preparation for Total Consecration to the Immaculate Mary according to St. Maximilian Kolbe.” In the book it says, “It is the weakest ones who need their Mother most and have a special right to be carried in Her arms, close to Her heart. And remember that you are one of these privileged children: you have a particular need of Her, and that is why She calls you to consecrate yourself to her.”(Page13-14). I realized my particular need of Mary is to help lead me in my vocation in being a religious sister.
]For many years, Oklahoma’s Archbishop, Paul Coakley, has wanted to create a new religious order that would serve the Oklahoma City Archdiocese. After the Reflection day in May of 2024, I was invited to get the know the other women who were discerning to be in the new religious order. We would meet once a month and pray the evening prayer (divine liturgy hours) once a week over zoom. In May of 2025, we were given the application and I applied. In September of 2025, we then moved into the Carmelite of St. Therese of the Infant Jesus convent for another discernment year and became aspirants.
In January of 2026, the Archbishop religious order committee decided to go in a different direction and that we would be the new class of the Carmelite order. When I was told this, I felt an immediate peace within my heart. The last six months of living at the convent, I have seen the day to day life of a Carmelite. From waiving at Sr. Maria Francesca daily as she goes to the recreation room after dinner, to seeing Sr. Immaculata always smiling, especially in the chapel, to watching the thunder game with Sr. Barbara Joseph, talking to Sr. Mary Frances about her daily adventures at St. Ann’s, laughing with Sr. Sylvia, and listening to Sr. Marianne’s life lessons are examples of St. Therese’s little way that draws me to the simplicity and the charism of the Carmelites. After reading, “Story of the Soul” I feel connected and can relate to St. Therese in regarding to her personality and longing to be with God.
Religious life to me is deepening your relationship with God by saying yes to his will and not your own. In a special and unique way, you serve his church and religious community. It is about being God’s daughter, a spiritual mother, a religious sister, and ultimately being a bride of Christ.
