to love him more perfectly
Lydia shares her vocation story:
I think I have always known what vocation God was calling me to. As a little girl, I read the stories of the saints. I loved St. Therese especially. I dreamed of one day doing what she did and joining an order. I was
pretty certain at that age of 7–9 that I would become a sister.
During middle school, I’m surprised it was still on my mind. I would be at youth group and thought to myself, “I could never be a nun, that’s too weird and my friends would not think I was cool.” So I forgot about it. In high school it wasn’t even on my mind. I was convinced I was going to get married. I went off to college with the same mindset. My mother got married at 19 so I thought I would do the same. I even became boy crazy in a sense where every guy I saw I would wonder if he was the one. I prayed for God to take the desire away and he did!
I went to SEEK that year and saw nuns for the first time in a while. This resurfaced my desires from so long ago. I told my spiritual director all of this and he told me to be open. About a year later I knew I needed to discern this, but didn’t want to. I had a crush on a guy I worked with, so I told God, “not yet,” since I wanted to pursue this. A few days later I found out he had a girlfriend. So I decided to commit to discernment. I told my spiritual director and he gave me orders to look at. The next 2 years he helped me grow in my spiritual life as I grew in my relationship with God. After graduation I decided I should start to visit orders.
First was the Benedictines. The Lord made it clear that I needed to talk to my sisters and He was not calling me to a contemplative order. Next were the Religious Sisters of Mercy of Alma, MI. I discerned with them for about a year and did 2 visits. By the second trip I knew it wasn’t right, but not sure why. So I sat in the chapel of their convent and prayed about it. I realized I wanted them to have more of a Eucharistic devotion and a Marian one too. I went to my room and decided to look up the Mercedarians and see how they compared. Right there it was “Eucharistic + Marian.”
Still hesitant to switch to looking at the Mercedarians, I talked with my spiritual director, who advised me to check them out and I could always go back to the RSMs later. So I visited Baton Rouge. I loved it immediately. The Sisters were wonderful, my prayer life was great. I got to adore daily and live life with the sisters. My only concern was that Alana was theretoo. She is my aunt and basically a sister to me and we are super close. I was worried that that may affect my experience. So I went to the Ohio location for my second visit. During my time at the Ohio location I simply lived life with the sisters. It felt like one big happy family. My visit was filled with so much peace and joy. My heart was content. On my last night the Lord really spoke to me. Earlier that day in my holy hour, I sat with the Lord for two hours simply being with him. I had always asked Him to be clear with me on what to do. While I still didn’t have certainty I was so peaceful and joyful I thought I may just have to join without having that moment from Him. That night I was getting ready to pray compline in the cell I was in when I was overwhelmed by the Lord’s presence. I grabbed the crucifix from my bed, and staring at it I wept. I felt the Lord telling me I was His and this was where He wanted me. I told the sisters the next day and my spiritual director the next week.
I love the Lord with all my heart and only desire to learn to love Him more perfectly and to serve His church bringing Him to others. That is the simplicity of it. The deepest desire of my heart is to love the Lord.
Can you help support women like Lydia to follow the Lord’s call and serve the Church through a vocation to the religious life?
